Journaling in 2022
New Year resolutions don’t work... for me.
I have tried, really, I’ve tried.
For years, I used to have a little notebook that I would always write ten, yes always ten, resolutions in. I would also look at my resolutions from the previous year and I can tell you... I do not recommend it. Most of my resolutions were to lose weight, meet a good guy, find a hobby, and the super generic “be happier”
They were superficial and honestly really depressing. It was like a plan (that I never followed through on) on how to be someone else. So, around the age of 30 I stopped making resolutions; no more “New Year, New me”.
Flash-forward to 2021, I’m 38, have “a good partner”, I’m a mom, I think I have a handle on life, and I have gotten back into journaling. Actually, I am in the home stretch of a 6-week journaling program that uses journaling prompts to learn how journaling can be used as a tool in therapy, how it can foster creativity, and how you can use it to reflect on your life.
A couple weeks ago the prompt was called “time capsule.” We were tasked to summarize the prior month--HA!I could barely remember what I had eaten for dinner the night before, there was NO way this prompt was going to work for me. The program leader, knowing how to do her job, had us pull up our calendars, and it all came flooding back. I had forgotten all the things I had done just the month before: ran a marathon, went camping, took a trip to Massachusetts with my family... events you don't think you'll file away in the recesses of your brain so quickly, but as someone who always has something going on and suffers from mom brain, that's what happens.
I was shocked, well, more pleasantly surprised that I was able to write page after page summarizing the events. And not just the timeline of the events. I wrote about how I felt during each event. I wrote about what I loved and enjoyed, I wrote about what sucked and how I could have done things differently. By the end of our time, I had a beautiful snapshot of the previous month. But here’s where it got interesting. After each prompt, we are asked to read over what we wrote and write a quick two or three sentence reflection. That week I was able to reflect on my own well-being during the last month, something that I barely do at the end of a day, let alone a month. Journaling can help get the thoughts out of your head, but the reflection is where you learn from it. The reflection is like having a conversation with yourself about what you wrote and how it made you feel. The reflection is what I was missing all those years ago. The reflection is the real gift.
So, here's my gift to you. Instead of just looking at 2022 and thinking of all the ways you can be a better you, get a pen and paper and open your calendar. Go through each month of 2021 and try to put yourself back in that month. Then take a minute or two, or 20, to write. Think about your life for the last 12 months.
What did you do this year?
What or who helped you through this year?
What were your biggest wins for the year, what were your biggest challenges?
What were your favorite books, movies, shows and songs?
What emotions did you experience this last year?
Go through each month writing as much as you can, or want to, about it. And then, when you feel done, take a little break, get some water, a small snack and then come back and read what you wrote. Seriously, this may be the most important part. Sit with your words and reflect on 2021. Reflection helps you notice patterns and themes in your writing. Themes in your life. What feelings kept popping up throughout the year? Did they come from similar situations? Did you have recurring interactions, good or bad, with people throughout the year?
Write a couple sentences as you reflect.
Now... you can look forward.
Knowing where you are coming from helps you to figure out where you are going or where you want to go. It helps you plan for the next year, so think about last year and then you can move forward.
When you think about moving forward, you can ask yourself these questions.
What are your top three priorities for next year?
What feelings do you want to embrace next year?
What do you want to explore next year?
They aren’t resolutions. They are things you hope to strive for because you have taken a journey back through time and have seen what works and doesn’t work and what you truly want for yourself.
Resolutions may not work for me, but reflection does. So, write, reflect, and THEN go ahead and resolve. Happy new year
